Monday, August 31, 2015

What is a Postmodern Mom?

JT Morrow, Whistler's Mother Tweeting for WSJ, 


According to academics, "modernism" is about the new and improved: optimism facing the future. (South Pacific's Nellie Forbush singing "Cockeye Optimist.")

"Postmodernism" is self-critical, cynical and anxiety-ridden.  (The Good Wife with a dash Portlandia's political correctness.)

The Postmodern Mother worries about her performance.  Is she a good enough mother?  Does she sufficiently encourage her children to feel confident, empowered and gifted.

To that end, she navigates numerous high-stakes decisions. Car-talk with her children is her favorite pastime.

Her conscience dictates that she recycle, reuse and donate. She shops mainly at Trader Joe's, Whole Foods and the local Farmers' Market for nutritional value.  But, in truth, she adores fancy cakes and cookies from the local bakery.  (She is a hedonist when no one is looking.)

She can build self-esteem and complicated Lego kits.  She believes in the virtues of breast-feeding and clean, fresh air.   She extols "inclusiveness" from play-dates to proms - all from a comfortable co-op in the city or private home in the suburbs.

And when her perfect little Millennials grow up, she lovingly listens to their gender identity crises, their pansexual preferences, and their start-up fantasies propelled by social networking and personal branding. Her children are her passion (and hopefully her husband and career too).

The Postmodern Mom jogs, blogs and logs in to FB to see what her grandchildren ate for dinner. (If she doesn't have grandchildren, her children haven't friended her yet.)  She tweets occasionally, rarely bothering to see if anyone retweeted her post.

Yoga is her outlet.  Wine is her sedative.  Caffeine is her drug of choice.

And she is probably a stepmother too, because Baby-Boomers who had Gen-Xers changed partners pretty early on, producing Millennials the second time around.   

Of course, most of these attributes do not apply to me.  (I hate Whole Foods and rarely jog these days.) 

This blog is about the Good, the Bad and the Ugly sides of mothering in this Postmodern, relativist culture.  It is about the pressures of trying to be proactive (but not a Helicopter harridan), present but not pushy, a Tiger Mom with a playful disregard, and a judicious sage in the face of her children's preferred Authority Figure - the Internet,

Please join me, if you have been there and done that.
Fellow Postmodern Moms, Welcome!

Sincerely,
Beth New York

2 comments:

  1. Great essay! I feel like I still have at least a half a foot in the modernism camp, but the Postmodern description feels very familiar.

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    1. You and me, T - we didn't get the instruction manual for this generation. So glad you like the essay! Hugs, Beth

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